Adventures in Crazy Workouts: Flywheel

I have a love/hate relationship with cycling classes. Okay, it’s mostly hate. I used to take them all the time at my University gym a couple years ago, ya know, when I was living my best life with a free gym included in my tuition. I thrived on my cycling 7 am classes on Monday’s and have tried to re-create those happy times in these trendy NYC cycling classes. I do love a good Monster cycle class, and I had some high hopes for Flywheel. As you guys know, or maybe don’t, I very much dislike Soulcycle. It’s got flashing colored lights, there’s a lot of yelling, and too many different moves (i.e MOVE UP! DOWN! HANDS AT FIRST! SECOND! RIGHT! LEFT! JUMP!), you get it. I prefer not to be screamed at while I workout, but maybe just me.

I figured I would try this place, simply because the first class was free. I went in, found my assigned bike, and patted myself on the back for being all early. The instructor walked in, talked at a normal volume and I took it as a good sign. As soon as the thought This might actually be okay started forming in my brain, he began to play house music and yelled, “YOU GUYS READY TO GO?!” It was definitely a struggle after that. I checked my apple watch probably every 10 minutes waiting for it to end. Which is sad because the only other time I do that when I work out is when I’m running—because running is just excruciating.

You know how you have ac certain voice when you talk to someone professional? Some people refer to this as their “customer service voice.” Our cycling instructor obviously had a “cycling instructor voice.” He sounded like a gay radio announcer. If you’re wondering “hmm, what does that sound like?” Here’s my best impression:

Okay it was deeper than that, but you get it. Now, I don’t wanna make fun of this dude. However, I can because I know he was putting this voice on. Imagine hearing that mixed with way-too-loud house music.

The one thing that was actually different about this class that I enjoyed was the ranking. We were able to see how we ranked in the class the entire time and even had short bursts of competition with each other towards the end of the ride. Definitely made me push myself to go faster!

Overall, this wasn’t my favorite. I like cycling, but hate when my ear drums burst while have a seizure from flashing lights. This is a workout, not a Kesha concert, thanks.

Adventures in Crazy Workouts: DanceBody

It has been a hot minute since I did one of these babies. I’ve been doing a lot of the same things and trying to keep it consistent, rather than fun. What can I say, I like a routine. I’ve also really been enjoying CorePower Yoga’s Yoga Sculpt class. It’s longer than normal, but I feel amazing afterwards. Definitely worth checking out if you have even a slight interest in yoga. 

On to what I ACTUALLY did. I went to my very first DanceBody class, on a Sunday, no less. I want businesses to know that influence by bloggers works cause the only reason I know about DanceBody is because of a blogger. I, being uncoordinated with dance and having *ahem* larger boobs, was apprehensive about taking this class. After I booked it, I thought “Why am I trying to take this class? My boobs are gonna fly all over the place and I’m going to look absolutely ridiculous. I really should just do a cycling class where it’s dark and comfortable.” BUT, it is 2018 and I’m not here for my own negativity about what my body looks like while trying to workout, thanks. I decided to book the class and interested to see how it would go.

I took the “Follow Along” class, which is the least amount of choreography and concentration. First, everything is fine, you’re dancing looking weird but it’s fine!! Next thing you know you’re sweating, calves dying and somehow it’s only been 15 minutes. This class was no joke. We were jumping and dancing for literally 45 minutes. There’s about an 8 minutes break to do arms, but is it really a break if you’re still moving your entire body I think no! 

The last 10 minutes is a lovely pilates tone while on a mat. It’s nice because you’re on the ground, no more jumping and you can finally breathe. It’s not nice because you’re somehow still out of breath, what the heck, your leg does not bend that way and oh my god I’m shaking. 

All in all, I loved the workout. Yes, it was very hard and yes, watching myself bounce around VERY uncoordinated was weird. However, I tried it, I liked it, I got out of my comfort zone and I didn’t die. The earth is still turing and no one stopped dancing in order to laugh at how uncoordinated I was. I recommend it if you’re a cardio queen like myself, would rather dance than workout or maybe can actually dance? If I was a richer woman, this would be my go-to after a long weekend of drinking and too much pizza. 

 

Adventures in Crazy Workouts: CorePower Yoga

One of the newer workouts in the great city of New York is CorePower yoga. As the self-proclaimed Queen of Cardio, this yoga craze thing is not something I take part in. I don’t consider “stretching” to be a workout and therefore never do it. At all. Which is kinda bad I think? I never really give my muscles a chance to recover or whatever yoga does for them. I’m forcing myself to do different workouts in order to:

  1. Not get super bored working out and doing the same stuff every time
  2. Maybe change my body, have more overall tone and use different muscles??
  3. I feel like its good for me, according to random people

I challenged myself to do a week of CorePower yoga (on top of the other stuff I do). I started on Saturday, which just also happened to be the day I moved apartments. I decided to do the Hot Fusion class and I actually really enjoyed myself! None of the moves were super challenging or anything I couldn’t do as a mere beginner and newbie. It was definitely hot, but not too bad. I sweat like crazy, but I felt like I got a pretty decent workout in. 

I tried to go again on Sunday, but after moving my entire life the day before, I coolant muster the strength. I decided to go again on Thursday and chose the Core Power 2 class. I definitely should have read the description for this class because I was not prepared for what I signed up for. I ASSUMED it would just be a casual, normal, yoga class. Since there was no indication from the title of said class that it was “hot,” I assumed it would be air conditioned normally. I was wrong in my assumption. Not only that, it quiet possibly was the hottest I’ve ever been in my life inside of a building or honestly anywhere in my life. I’m so very glad I decided to wash my face before I went because I would have most definitely sweat it off anyway. I didn’t take off my waterproof mascara and that shit went right into my eyeballs as did gallons of sweat. I washed my hair that morning and even the ENDS of my hair were wet. I can’t talk enough about how hot and sweaty this class was I literally almost walked out simply so I could BREATHE AIR. My yoga mat definitely doubled as a slip-n-slide by the end. The actual yoga part was very good, a little more challenging, but still do-able. I was going to go again on Saturday, but after actually reading the description of the classes I was like “I’m not washing my hair after this I refuse” so I only used two classes out of my free week. 

Also funny side note: At the end of the class, the instructor played this like soothing music so we could like idk, relax in our pool of sweat, and I was like “huh this song sounds familiar.” I thought maybe I had it on some weird sleep playlist or something and then I remembered its the super annoying emotional song they play every time something intense happens between Fitzgerald and Olivia on Scandal. It got to the point where when I was binging Scandal I wanted to skip their parts because they play it EVERY TIME. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then I suggest you get some damn culture in your life and watch Scandal. 

Overall, I liked the classes. I could not do yoga like, by itself, but every now and then, I can handle. I definitely won’t be doing any more hot yoga classes at least for a while.