I Re-watched Sex and the City and It Changed How I Feel About Aiden

I’m Stanford!!!! This is the first time I’ve written in months and if you’re wondering why I’m writing this, of all things, I have no answers. I do, kinda, have a reason for this post.

So let’s go back, why am I re-watching Sex and the City for the 16 billionth time? I started listening to this new podcast called The Bradshaw Boys. It’s 3 straight guys watching Sex and the City for the first time (mostly) and then discussing it. Super hilarious and fun, highly recommend. At first, I wasn’t going to go back and watch the series with them since I’d already seen it multiple times. As they started going through the episodes, I really just couldn’t help myself and jumped in around Season 2.

One of the surprising things is the newfound annoyance with Carrie. I mean, come on girl, how are you trying to make this relationship with Big work if you never tell him how you feel about things? Every fight they ever have is about how she needs/wants something from him emotionally and is too scared to ask for it. This leads to her inevitable explosion and makes it a giant deal. I don’t wanna say the Big is innocent here, not at all. Anytime she does finally ask what the deal is, he’s usually super vague. I don’t, by any means, think their relationship is something to strive for. I do, however, get where she’s coming from a little. Personally, I find when I really like a guy; I hate bringing up any relationship talk. If you’ve been dating around a while, you sort of get the clue that when you bring that stuff up, it can blow up in your face. You either hear something you don’t like, or get rejected, and so it ends up just nagging you until you explode. I will say that sometimes when she does explode on him, it gets her the results she was looking for. For instance, when he doesn’t tell her he loves her in Season 2, she gets pissy and leaves him at a party. The next day, he actually says it over the phone. Thus, starting the cycle of silence, fight and reward. This is extremely toxic and pretty immature behavior, but I’ve been there. Should they have ended up together? No. You cant allow someone to treat you a certain way for X amount of months and then be surprised when they don’t get the hint that it’s not actually what you want.

I’ve never really been “big” on Big, but on the “Big vs. Aiden” debacle, I’ve always been Team Aiden. He was so sweet and soon much better than Big! I would argue Carrie was over correcting. By that, I mean she hated how badly she was treated by Big, so she went super left field. She needed the opposite of Big and she definitely got it. I always thought he was great, but in actuality, he’s kinda blah. He’s just there all the time. In her space and her life, but doesn’t really add anything. I don’t think he could ever actually hang out with her and her friends. He immediately tried to change her with the smoking thing. Literally all they do is lounge around her place being boring. We give “nice” guys such a huge pass, simply because they’re nice, but let’s please up the bar ladies. Maybe if we did, there’d be more nice guys to go around! Nice should be base level, what else does he have besides nice? I think Carrie stayed with him half of the time, just because he was nice, and then the rest of the time, just because she felt bad for him because he was nice. Think about when she first said, “I love you” to him. She said it right after he did and she had just cheated on him with Big. She didn’t love him, clearly. Also, they just truly did not mesh well. He didn’t like smokers; he liked the outdoors and loved staying in with his dog. She liked to party, smoke and be glamorous. She literally never went to a single party or outing when they were together, I mean what up with that? At least Big could keep up with her, her friends and her lifestyle. I get it nice is so refreshing. Dating a bunch of crappy dudes will really have you reaching for some boredom in your love life. It’s easier and you think that’ll mean predictability and that it’ll work out better. Spoiler alert, it doesn’t. Nice just translates to “I’m saving myself from getting hurt this time” which isn’t always the case, especially with Carrie.

It’s probably true that every time you watch a series again, you get something different out of it. You hopefully have different experiences all the time, so you watch things though a different perspective. I know Carrie’s overcorrecting because I’ve been there myself. On the Big vs. Aiden thing, I’m neither. I’m more of a Harry-Smith-Steve gal myself.

Love You, But Get Over Yourself

It’s Valentine’s Day! Everyone today is talking about self-love and loving yourself matter if you’re single or dating someone or you married, which is great! Do that! Today I wanted to shake it up and talk about something a little bit different. I talked a little bit about this on my Instagram stories, which if you’re not following me on Instagram you should be, hello. I somehow inspired myself to write this little reminder for you, on this day of love of you and/or someone else.

I had a moment, well more than a moment, more like 6 months in my life where I gained weight when I first moved to New York. I haven’t talked about it at all because, really not in the best place yet to discuss it(but I’m getting there).  It was not the best time considering all the crazy changes happening in my life. I started off with a very low self-esteem as a kid. It’s gotten way better over the years but it’s still not amazing especially when it comes to my body. I had very weird relationship with food and still struggle with it! So when I gained weight for the first time in forever, I panicked. I didn’t know what the heck was going on, I was not happy about it and it only got worse once I started focusing on it.

I spent a lot of time last summer putting on clothes that I had been wearing for years and noticing that they didn’t look the same way or I didn’t feel the same way in them. It got to a point where I wasn’t even sure what size I was anymore and so I stopped buying new clothes because it would bum me out. At the end of the day, I still had to live my life. I wasn’t gonna sit in my room and cry about it even though that’s really what really what I wanted to do. Summer is the most fun, so a lot of the time I just had to put on what I had and try not to think about it.

Nobody noticed or cared except for me and I think that’s one of the things that got me out of the house half the time is nobody is going to notice. Nobody cares about me, nobody looks at myself the way I do or looks at me in the critical way that I do. That has helped me more than anything, so I guess today I’m preaching get over yourself. Nobody cares what you look like half the time, nobody noticed the pimple on your face, nobody noticed that you look a little bloated today. Everyone else is way too busy thinking about how they look, feel and act to also worry about you and your crap!

The people who love you and the people that matter, don’t give a singular crap about the dumb, awful things you think about you. It’s nice to know you’re the only one who cares about every single thought in your head or about what you look like every single day! Obviously love yourself, don’t think that you’re a piece of crap because you gained a little weight or you have a pimple on your face or you did something embarrassing 2 months ago.

Some of the best times I’ve had in my life were when I sucked it up and did whatever it was regardless of how I felt about my outward appearance.

Read and Review: Your February Reading List

I’ve been meaning to do this for ages, since I love reading and sharing which books I loved. However, in earlier months, I’ve just managed a couple of books and who wants one review a month? I need a whole list. So I hunkered down and managed to read 5 this month, which I consider a feat, thank you very much! Especially with Netflix putting out new TV I want to binge once a week (help). Anyway, here’s all the books I read and how I liked them! Enjoy

The Handmaid’s Tale

The Gist: Post apocalyptic world where some women are servants and men control everything. Yeah that’s it

Thoughts and Feels: I read this mostly because it’s a show and instead of paying for Hulu, I decided to read the book. It was a relatively fast read, but only because I kept waiting for it to get good. The premise is really interesting, but left a lot to the imagination. I never understood people’s roles or what really happened to cause this societal shift? It’s one of those books where the end leaves you to come up with your own conclusion, which as a write myself, feels like a cop out.

 Rating: 4/10-Meh

Pieces of Her

The Gist: Andrea moves back to her hometown in Georgia after her mother becomes ill. Her and her mother experience a tragic shooting that leaves Andrea questioning everything she thought she knew about her mother and her own life.

Thoughts and Feels: Twists! Turns! Murder! I’m here for it! I love a good murder mystery and this one was insane. I love a good book that just absolutely consumes my life and I read it every free second I have. It’s one of those really rare books that you don’t guess the end or half of the things that happen, for that matter.

Rating: 10/10-please read

Cop Town

The Gist: Atlanta cops Kate Murphy and Maggie Lawson work to uncover a cop killer, while navigating life as a female police officer in the 1970’s. Let’s just say it’s not easy.

Thoughts and Feels: I LOVED THIS ONE. All about bad ass lady cops in the 70s what more could you want? Also the whole crazy-dont-know-what’s-gonna-happen-murder mystery. Basically going through Karin Slaughter’s entire “discography” (but what’s the book form of that word??) and I’m not mad about it.

Rating: 10/10-please read

All We Ever Wanted

The Gist: At the heart of the lies and scandal, Tom, Nina, and Lyla are forced together—all questioning their closest relationships, asking themselves who they really are, and searching for the courage to live a life of true meaning (stole this from Amazon cause I really didn’t know how to summarize it)

Thoughts and Feels: This was a weird subject to touch on. Very much a “hot button” issue and I’m not really sure how I feel about this book. It did some things really well, but others maybe a little bit problematic. I usually love everything this author writes, but this one was puzzling.

Rating: 6/10 because I still liked the book, just not as much as I normally do

The Unexpected Truth About Animals

The Gist: Touches on a few misconceptions about animals and where those misconceptions came from in our history.

Thoughts and Feels: If you didn’t know this about me, I find animal documentaries super fascinating. I’ve been deciding whether to buy the book for a while and I’m very glad I did. History is crazy, animals are very weird and the writing is funny.

Rating: 8/10 not a murder mystery but still good

 

My Favorite Things in 2018

Does that title rhyme slightly? Just me? Great.

I wanted to do this wrap up of the stuff I really loved this year that I didn’t talk about and/or barely talked about. Sort of like a giant Sunday Summary, A.K.A that thing I don’t do anymore (but can still be viewed if you’re into that).

Best Hair Product of 2018:

The Tragic Before

Technically, this isn’t a product. HOWEVER, I discovered this dry shampoo blow drier trick and it is a game changer. Had bun hair all day and then someone wanted to hangout (and i did not want to have bun hair) so I tried this trick. Here’s the post I did and how it ended up going for me, but spoiler alert, it works.

Best Book in 2018:

If you need to know anything about me, it’s that I love to read. I’ve been slacking slightly with how much, but I’ve been picking up major speed with it lately. I’ve read roughly 20-ish books this year, which is kind of a lot. Trying to narrow it down to the best was hard, but some of the books I read just sort of ran together. Really thinking about doing a monthly post about the books I read the month before (mostly just to push myself to read more). OKAY on to my actual pick: You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero. I know what you’re thinking “Self-help book? That’s for sad weirdos.” Here’s the thing: You’re right! BUT, I’d argue that everyone is kind of a sad weirdo sometimes! I read this when I really needed something to give me things to do after I quit my job and when I needed a distraction from going down the “what if I have to move home because I can’t find a job” hole. I would honestly read it again, that’s how much I liked it. If you’re stuck in place in your life where you have no idea what you’re doing, read this. If you wanna make a crazy change, read this. It’s 2019, the year of making goals and gettin’ bread—as the memes say, so read it!

Best Makeup Product of 2018:

Okay I almost put something else for this that was expensive and to be fair, very good. I feel that I should instead pay homage to a brand who had my back when I was too broke to go to Sephora and get new stuff. That’s right I’m talking about ELF. You wouldn’t think with $1 brow pencils and $3 concealer would be worth putting on your face. I’m here to tell you, your assumptions are wrong. My brows are perfectly filled and my pores CONCEALED! Was actually not a fan of the bronzer cause it was too glittery for my tastes but that doesn’t mean it’s not quality! Okay done with my spiel.

Best Skincare Product of 2018:

Spoiler alert it’s like 2 dollars. Spoiler alert again, it’s lemon juice. I started using it and it felt like a miracle. Then I stopped for a few weeks recently, because I’m skeptical person and sometimes I don’t feel like buying lemons ya know. Started using them again and wow I forgot how good they are. My skin just has so much less redness and blackheads! It’s so great and so cheap.

Best Movie of 2018:

I know you all want me to say A Star is Born, but I’m sorry I can’t. The music is amazing, yes. Bradley Cooper is hot, yes. I absolutely knew what was gonna happen at the end and so I didn’t like it as much. Maybe if there was a world with no spoilers and people wouldn’t have talked about how amazing it was and subsequently ruining it. I also really don’t watch movies in theaters that much. I’ve seen maybe 3 movies this entire year, so I fell like I can’t say what the best movie this year is. I can say what the best movie I saw this year. It’s not new, it’s just new to me. Okay, it’s Steel Magnolias. This is a weird pick for me, since every time anyone would bring this up I’d immediately think “How can that be good? It sounds so corny.” It was on Netflix a few months back and it was a rainy Saturday, so I thought I’d give it a try. It’s set in a small town in Louisiana—hence the name. The thing about movies centered around the South is they’re always over exaggerated. Every other word is “crawfish” or “gumbo” or “pea-can pie!” I get it, its a movie, but that why I never really like them. This one doesn’t do that. Overall, its pretty reflective of life in smaller southern town and I loved it. I cried, I laughed and now I know why it wont so many awards. It’s not on Netflix anymore, but find it somewhere because it’s so good.

Best Show of 2018:

Okay this is so hard because I’ve seen so many good shows this year, but there’s only one that filled me with the most joy every time I turned it on: The Great British Baking Show. Am I late to this game? I really don’t know but this show is so good. I really loved watching to the point of watching two seasons in a about a week. I did it in a weird way where I watched seasons 5 & 6 first and in my humble opinion, those are the best seasons. After that, they change the hosts and Prue isn’t one of the judges and I need her color coordination in my life. I love the accents, the stuff they come up with and  Paul Hollywood is a cutie, I’m just gonna throw it out there. Really into shows that make me laugh and aren’t super dramatic lately and this one definitely fill that for me. I even watched it twice, so if you haven’t yet, here’s your notification.

Best Clothing Purchase of 2018:

This was the year I bought so many clothes, it’s obnoxious. Trying to “re-vamp” my wardrobe and also buying things for a 9-5 job was tough. I think the best purchase and the thing I got the most use out of were my Lululemon leggings. As you know, I’m more of a quantity over quality gal. Trends come and go a lot for me to be buying something that I may not wear in a few years that costs an arm and a leg. Also let’s keep it real, I’m still washing my clothes in a laundry mat for god’s sake. I’m in no place to be buying anything over 50 bucks. I completely believe in a good splurge for things that may be expensive, but you’ve been lusting after for a while. Hence, my purchase of these leggings. I really wanted to see if they are so different from the $20 Forever 21 leggings and I’m here to say yes they are. They fit like a glove, the length is always perfect (aka no bunching at the bottom) and they stay in place when I’m running. I still only have one pair so far, but 2019 I’ll be getting some more and really coming into my basic white girl form.

Best Workout of 2018:

 

So, I’m splitting this up by home workout and workout class, okay great:

Best home workout is always Tabata with Raneir Pollard hands down. He’s so fun and at the same time, the workout is always intense. It’s always my Monday go to for a good strong beginning to my week. Also, they just uploaded a new one!

Best workout class I’ve been to in the city is Yoga sculpt at Corepower yoga. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, If I were a richer woman, I’d be doing yoga twice a week at minimum. This particular class is not only yoga, but a little bit of cardio to satisfy my needs. They have them all over, so check them out if they’re near you!

 

Cheers to 2019! Can’t wait to make many more posts and let me know if there’s anything you’d like to see more of on the blog 🙂

2018: What A Year

Can I just say this was the longest year of my life?

I’ve learned a lot about myself that I didn’t know. I did things I never thought I would do. I definitely feel like I’ve matured a lot for just one year, but my 25 year old self might read this and internally groan—who’s to say?

Winter…was rough. Let’s start with the good! I discovered that snow storms are simultaneously amazing and horrifying. You’re scared your pipes will freeze and your heat will go out, but its so quiet and pretty to watch you’ll think you’re actually in heaven. Spent some fun times with Ruby (shout-out to Ruby because I really think I would’ve moved, had I not met her) doing things on my New York bucket list and eating some amazing food. Discovered some cool places near my apartment – like a bakery full of cat things and a place where I frequented to get bagel sandwiches. Christmas in New York is so cute and exciting to be a part of. Pushed myself to learn new things and tried to do things solo to make myself as happy as possible.

When I wrote my “goals” for 2018 and my year in a video, I was in a weird place. I was just starting to feel lonely, sad and very nostalgic. This feeling would definitely be an overriding emotion for the rest of the winter. I don’t know if it was what you’d call “seasonal depressive disorder” or just some serious growing pains, but I would say the winter was hard for me. I spent the majority of the time feeling unsuccessful and beating myself up frequently for not having my life look the way I’d pictured it when I moved to the city. Not just in my career, which I’ve talked about, but in all aspects of my life. I didn’t make a bunch of friends like I assumed I would. I spent 6 months in an apartment I hated and lived above a bar—unsurprisingly the worst place I’ve ever lived. I also went on a clump of last-luster dates and even one with a guy I can confidently say was a (borderline) sociopath. Everything about life doesn’t change immediately. I would say the weekends were hard when I had no plans and was stuck in my loud apartment with nothing to do.

Thankfully, Spring actually came after what felt like a trillion years. I made some really awesome friends and finally had a group that I felt were really my people. I moved to a new apartment and actually enjoyed being at there instead of feeling trapped.

In the summer of 2018, I finally quit my job in order to find something I really loved, which I did. Spent time doing things that inspired me and also had a lot of fun draining all my bank accounts.

Fall was definitely a big blur, but in a good way. I turned another year older with the best people I could ask for. Spent some much needed time at home, and for once, coming back to the city felt exciting instead of dreadful.

Of course, dating life is still pending, but three out of four ain’t bad!

One year ago, I was slightly sad, but very hopeful. I knew my life now  would not be the way it was then. I was right and couldn’t be happier about it. Here’s to more crazy times and doing things that scare the crap out of me.

 

The Sunday Summary

I haven’t done one of these in MONTHS, so I feel as if I need to update you guys on the things I really like lately. Pay attention (please), this is a good one.

Elf Concealer

I have this weird thing where I have two concealers. One is my expensive concealer for when I wanna look like a pore-less model and one for when I’m just living my everyday life as a regular human—or for when I wanna look good, but not that good. Just me? I happened to be in Target the other day and remembered I was running out of my regular human concealer, as well as my fancy one. A dilemma! On a whim, (and because I didn’t wanna go to the mad house that is Sephora), I bought this. Actually rivals my expensive concealer AND only $3?! I have turned a new leaf.

Graphic Tee Trend?

I never, In my wildest dreams, thought I would actually like this trend. I love pairing a tee with fancy pants (as seen below), especially patterned pants. Not by any means ready for Fall, (because Winter is next), but I do miss my pants. I’m still hesitant to buy any band t-shirt that I have never listened to, or a shirt that says something horrible like “beast mode.”

RX V.S. Lära Bars

It’s hard to pick which one I like better. RX bars are my personal OG. They have basic ingredients, big, taste amazing and have no added sugar. HOWEVER, Lära bars are making a serious contender. Some of them do have added sugar (usually only about 3g), but follow the same “basic ingredients” principal. They also have some amazing flavors like Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, Coconut Creme Pie and (my personal fave) Lemon Bar. They aren’t as big as RX bars, so I would say that’s their downfall. I know I’m late to the party on these, but maybe someone else is too, okay!!

Running on a Treadmill?

As you guys may know, I’ve been implementing running back into my daily workouts. I used to run solely outside (in the devil’s heat), but lately, I’ve been using the treadmill. At first, it was a ride on the struggle bus. You have nothing really to pay attention to except maybe a TV you can’t hear. You also aren’t really going anywhere, so it’s just you and your thoughts for however long you can stand it. Since switching to a focus on endurance, instead of focusing on speed, I’m actually enjoying it. I either listen to a podcast, or some of my favorite jams of the moment. Definitely not going fast, but I can usually last longer and run better on the treadmill. As with anything, the more you do it, the better you get.

Book of the Summer: You are a Badass by Jen Sincero

Late to this party as well, mostly because I figured this book was corny. I decided to switch it up and read a book or two about bettering my life—maybe give the murder mysteries a break. This was surprisingly good and only slightly corny. I would say, keep an open mind when reading. It gave me things to do while on the job hunt and inspired me to change some things in my life. Highly recommend if you feel like you’re struggling with anything or just need some inspiration*~.

 

The Tah-dews in Nashville

If you haven’t been keeping up with my ‘gram, I just got back from a super fun little va-cay in Nashville this week. I had the MOST fun (shoutout to my cousins Kristen and Andrew!). I honestly came back a little bummed? So weird, I kind of get like that when I visit the south.  I love NYC, but there’s nothing like decompressing in the south for a few days. When I moved here, I never thought in a billion years I would be saying I actually miss the South. Somewhere the universe is laughing at me and my naiveté. Anyway, I’ve been to Nashville a couple times and I wanted to share some stuff that I did that I recommend!

Fourth of July Fireworks Downtown

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This is highly specific to the 4th, but wow they were great. Second only to NYC, of course. They start at 9:30 and last until 10. I was lucky enough to see them from this GORGEOUS downtown apartment. She had full view of them and I was in heaven. She also had the cutest little Persian cats, so, obviously #goals. Just trying to be the NYC equivalent, ya know?

 

Murals

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There’s actually a bunch of murals I wanted to check out, but we only got to this one. There’s also angel wings one and “Nashville looks good on you.” Found this one via thefashionablybroketeacher on Instagram! She’s based in Philly, but goes to Nashville all the time (jealous), so I looked at her pictures for some ideas! This mural went perfectly with all of our fourth of July garb.

Frothy Monkey

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Horrible name, amazing salad.

Hiking Trails

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No pictures of this because we were so ~one~ with nature, or I forgot, you decide. They have so many just outside the city and they’re so cute. If I lived here and simultaneously had all of my shit together, I would run at least one day. Great for when you wanna workout, but not super hard.

Nama Sushi

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Been to this place twice now, and it’s amazing. We happened to go when they had half-priced rolls which made it taste that much better. You should definitely try the seaweed salad, sounds horrifying but very good. Trust me.

Losers Bar

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Will I come here every time I go to Nashville? Yes. Is it because I saw Garrett Hedlund the first time I went and must see him again? No….maybe a little. They play my favorite country band of all time, Brooks & Dunn, so it is a must-go. 

Meowsic City Cafe

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Cutest little place and I get to pet cats? I’m there. All of the cats are adoptable and even Kristen liked it (and she thinks cats are weird and they say the same about her, probably). All I wanna know is, when are we getting one in NYC?

The Candle Bar

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The day was very gross and rainy, so perfect weather to chill and make some candles! So many fragrances, I could barely choose. I felt like a 60 year old grandma chemist with my beaker and scale! Loved the concept and again, where’s the one in NYC?

Hattie B’s Chicken

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Three words: BETTER. THAN. CANES. Still need the sauce, but the chicken was unbelievable and definitely satisfied a very hungover and hangry me. There’s always a line, but you have to go. With three locations in Nashville, its gotta be good.

There you have it, pals! Nashville is one of my favorite places and is home to one of my favorite people, so I absolutely love going. My only qualm is that we went to a party and all the men wore flip-flops. Guys, get it together! Just kidding (kinda). 

 

NYC Things That Are Worth the Hype (and the Stuff That’s Just Hype)

I wanted to write this post because I feel like I love trying all the things people rave about (or post really pretty Instagram pictures of) and I wanted to give some honest opinions. Ya girl isn’t sponsored, so I’m allowed to say when things are actually worth the money and the ‘gram pic, or if they’re just “the ‘gram pic and leave” sort of thing. Here are a few worth those coins:

Murray’s Cheese Bar: 

“You’ve talked about this like 8 times we know you love it.” I don’t wanna hear the haters right now!!!!! I love this place and I will talk about it as many times as I want this is my blog!!! Okay I’m done

Magnolia Bakery’s Banana Pudding:

I’ve had a better cupcake in my day, (don’t burn me for that), but this stuff is unreal. It should honestly have its own name because banana pudding makes me think of Jello pudding and that’s just gross. This stuff is light, airy and not at all the gloppy goop that is Jello.

Freeman’s

Their door is all over the ‘gram, but their food is worth a stop as well. Pretty sure me and my friend indulge in 3 full courses and no regrets. Also Paul Giamatti sat next to us so it’s gotta be good!

Agavé

Will all of these be about food??? The answer is maybe, stay tuned. I loved this place. Super hard to get into if you don’t have a reservation, but worth the wait. Atmosphere is slamming and the drinks are continuous, which can be hard to find in a bottomless brunch. “Sorry we’re going to ignore you now that you’ve had 3 drinks and also half of this is water.” None of that please. I’d go back just for the drinks and our super cool waitress (even though I forgot her name and I’m upset about it).

A Yankee’s Game

No, I don’t suddenly care about baseball, although a beautiful baseball player in my life should sway me. Sometimes, I like baseball rather than football. There’s annoying fans in both, but baseball is less drunk angry yelling. Also might be because the only football games i’ve been to have no alcohol and I’m surrounded by my dangerously drunk peers. At any rate, it makes me feel super NYC without having to get all dressed up.

Central Park

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This place can be a little terrifying because it is HUGE, but worth a look. One day, I hope to just walk the entire thing in order to see all it has to offer. Restaurants, statues and iconic scenes are all up in here. If you go in deep enough, you can forget you live in a city that always smells.

IPic Theaters 

While I could’ve done without the waiter saying “you guys okay?” while there were guns a blazin’ or when he gave us the check while a very serious scene was on, I still recommend this. Nothin’ like relaxing in a giant chair, a blanket, eating some truffle fries and watching a movie on a big screen. Not a cheap thing to do all the time, but definitely when its gross outside and you still want to leave your bed.

Finally, here are the things you can just skip because they are the equivalent of the shrugging emoji:

Rainbow Bagel:

All the rage in BK right now because you can get them at The Bagel Store in Williamsburg. Very cute and make a great pic, but eating it? Kinda ew. I am the queen of sugar and this was too much for me. I ended up just wanting a regular bagel and this was just sweet bread and a choking amount of icing.

The “club” scene:

I love nothing more than getting down with some gal pals, but this is just not my vibe. I will say, I have had a fun time once, but I’m over it. It takes a village (a promoter) to even get you in and even in a expedited line, there probably 30 other girls waiting for the same promoter. You feel out of place if you aren’t in a bodycon dress and there’s no where you can even think about talking to anyone. So many better places for dancing without feeling old (EDM hurts my ears).

Please Don’t Tell:

I’m shocked I wasn’t accosted for even taking a picture in this place. Over hyped and so unnecessarily boujee, this place was just not for me. Speakeasies are all the rage and I’ve been wanting to try this one since I was just a wee intern two years ago. Unfortunately, I like to talk to people outside my party in a bar and drink things that I recognize. Not only did I pay $17 but I didn’t even like the drink and got yelled at for getting up and talking to someone (a cute boy). You will never see me in this place again.

Sunday in Brooklyn:

I’ve been lusting after these pancakes since I first moved here (pathetic??). I finally decided to try them randomly this weekend. So thick, I didn’t finish them and just a strange flavor overall. I actually did like the vibe of the place, however, just not the pancakes. Not taking a dump on the whole restaurant, but the cakes you can “keep it.”

Tree Lighting in Rockefeller Center:

Granted, I missed it because I didn’t get in line at 3pm like a psycho, I’m still not a fan. This is one of those things where you’re thinking you really wanna do it and so is about 4,000 people, not including tourists. Ended up waiting in a line for an hour and having a cop laugh at us because there was no way we were gonna see anything of interest. Very Shocked and Upset.

Should I call this Part I? I can definitely see myself doing more of these because I love sharing what I love almost as much as I love sharing what I hate! (just kidding…..kinda)

Adventures in Crazy Workouts: CorePower Yoga

One of the newer workouts in the great city of New York is CorePower yoga. As the self-proclaimed Queen of Cardio, this yoga craze thing is not something I take part in. I don’t consider “stretching” to be a workout and therefore never do it. At all. Which is kinda bad I think? I never really give my muscles a chance to recover or whatever yoga does for them. I’m forcing myself to do different workouts in order to:

1. Not get super bored working out and doing the same stuff every time
2. Maybe change my body, have more overall tone and use different muscles??
3. I feel like its good for me, according to random people

I challenged myself to do a week of CorePower yoga (on top of the other stuff I do). I started on Saturday, which just also happened to be the day I moved apartments. I decided to do the Hot Fusion class and I actually really enjoyed myself! None of the moves were super challenging or anything I couldn’t do as a mere beginner and newbie. It was definitely hot, but not too bad. I sweat like crazy, but I felt like I got a pretty decent workout in. 

I tried to go again on Sunday, but after moving my entire life the day before, I coolant muster the strength. I decided to go again on Thursday and chose the Core Power 2 class. I definitely should have read the description for this class because I was not prepared for what I signed up for. I ASSUMED it would just be a casual, normal, yoga class. Since there was no indication from the title of said class that it was “hot,” I assumed it would be air conditioned normally. I was wrong in my assumption. Not only that, it quiet possibly was the hottest I’ve ever been in my life inside of a building or honestly anywhere in my life. I’m so very glad I decided to wash my face before I went because I would have most definitely sweat it off anyway. I didn’t take off my waterproof mascara and that shit went right into my eyeballs as did gallons of sweat. I washed my hair that morning and even the ENDS of my hair were wet. I can’t talk enough about how hot and sweaty this class was I literally almost walked out simply so I could BREATHE AIR. My yoga mat definitely doubled as a slip-n-slide by the end. The actual yoga part was very good, a little more challenging, but still do-able. I was going to go again on Saturday, but after actually reading the description of the classes I was like “I’m not washing my hair after this I refuse” so I only used two classes out of my free week. 

Also funny side note: At the end of the class, the instructor played this like soothing music so we could like idk, relax in our pool of sweat, and I was like “huh this song sounds familiar.” I thought maybe I had it on some weird sleep playlist or something and then I remembered its the super annoying emotional song they play every time something intense happens between Fitzgerald and Olivia on Scandal. It got to the point where when I was binging Scandal I wanted to skip their parts because they play it EVERY TIME. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then I suggest you get some damn culture in your life and watch Scandal. 

Overall, I liked the classes. I could not do yoga like, by itself, but every now and then, I can handle. I definitely won’t be doing any more hot yoga classes at least for a while. 

Week 4: The Finale

Oh. My. God

This last month has been the toughest shit ever. Yes, I am a health freak for the most part, but ya girl loves junk on a occasion. I have never gone this far without eating any thing I would consider “bad.” That horrible, dumb quote from Kate Moss that’s like “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” is a giant, awful lie that she tells herself because she hates her body and herself. Guess what? I love myself and I’m gonna eat fries when I’m hungover on a Sunday and that’s FINE. I like my body enough to where I’m gonna do what I want. It aint perfect, but if I have to suffer like this to look like her, then nah.

As a human who interacts with other humans on a daily basis, I am BOMBARDED with sugar every single day. It’s in the office, it’s on the subway and it’s even on my Instagram. There is no point where I “forget” about sugar, it’s everywhere, all the time. Because I am also a human of 23 years, I know what sugar tastes like and my brain is like “oh yeah that shit is good please get back to eating that” so of course I also think about it all the time.

I will say this week wasn’t as bad since I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m kind of nervous I’ll get back into some of my bad habits, but I’m determined to keep this up for the most part. I’m definitely not gonna eat sugar just for the sake of eating it, but will be giving in when I wanna claw my arm off for some chocolate (i’m human).

The 2 reasons I’ve made it through this horrible month:

1. Other millions and billions of people have done it, and if I didn’t do it, I’d feel like a failure. I’m super competitive and I gotta at least be on par with other people when it comes to health.
2. I said I would on this blog. I could have just lied and said I did while I ate my cupcakes, but I would feel bad for lying. Not sure why, cause who cares, but I wanna be authentic on here. I also verbally told people, so again, I’d feel guilty.

Body Feels

My body does look pretty great I will say that. I lost the little bit of “pudge” or whatever you wanna call it and I’m back to my “normal.” Don’t have abs now or anything crazy, but that its what has gotten me through parts of this whole thing is the fact that I look damn good again. I never weigh myself, so I always go by what I look like in clothes (it’s weird but it works). “I “feel” overall pretty good too. Not like “wow night and day totally different person” good, but pretty good. Waking up in the morning is noticeably easy and I have a good amount of energy like all day. The exception is when I eat almond butter, I feel like shit but I think that’s just a me thing. My body rejects all things nut related, I have figured out(or am I allergic??? scary thought).

The Face

My face didn’t change at all really. I’ve pumped my body with enough meds (acutane thank you) to where I just don’t really breakout anymore, so not having a breakout is kinda normal (although even the occasional breakout didn’t happen). I kinda just look the same. I thought maybe my dark circles would get better, but nope. Those babies just occur no matter what, I suppose.

Foods I will Be Keeping Around in my Diet:

Cinnamon

Kinda dumb, but this has made things taste sooooooo much better without adding sugar to it. I used to not like cinnamon very much (cinnamon buns are still really not my thing, no I’m not dead inside), but I’ve found it to be so useful lately when it comes to a sweeter breakfast/snack.

Apple Cider Vinegar 

Okay I’m gonna be really real, I have no idea what this has actually done for me because I’ve added so many things to my diet. HOWEVER, for the simple fact that I still have some left and have gotten used to it, I’m gonna keep it up. I feel like its really good for digestion, but that could be all in my head.

Clementines

Or mandarin oranges, I’m not picky. I absolutely love them and I bought them on a whim. It’s replaced my sugary dessert after dinner and it’s almost as good.

Foods I’ll Probably Never Touch Again

Tahini

Okay this stuff is pretty good, but I got sick of it pretty quick. Might still put it on veggies, but as far as salad dressing and having to buy it all the time, nah. I liked it, but not in love with it.

Almond Butter, Peanut Butter and all the stupid nutt butters

I love this stuff, which means I eat a lot of it. That also means I feel HORRIBLE after eating this stuff. It’s not like “oh wow I’m full whew I gotta chill” it’s more like “please let me go home in the middle of work to sit in the fetal position and fart myself into oblivion.” TMI , but I can’t have this in my home anymore it’s detrimental to my health and happiness.

Chia Pudding

This stuff just takes wayy too much to be good and even then, isn’t great. I’m sure its very healthy, but just not for me. I’ll be sicking to GF overnight oats from now on.

Cacao Nibs

I don’t need to say much more on these, but I really wanna know how health people are eating this. They are literally so bitter. I just can’t. So awful. I spent 20 bucks on a bag of them, please hold me.

 

Overall, I felt the most amazing at week 1 and some of week 2(besides the hormonal thing). Past that, it’s kinda made me hangry and super annoyed. I’m thinking about how badly I want a cookie and it annoys me that I’m not eating it, basically. I love myself and treat myself often, so this has just not been great. I definitely think this is something that’s easier with someone doing it with you. I have no one who wanted to do this horrible thing with me, so there’s no one to suffer with. Misery loves company.

I do feel like this was worth it. I will not be going back to putting pounds of sugar in my coffee, or eating a cookie every night. I’m NOT a diet person, its either a full lifestyle change or nothing for me(and its let me stick to a healthy life way easier). I needed this just to break some dumb sugar habits and now that I have, I’m sticking to it(just not gonna go a straight month without sugar again).

 

I proved I could do it and I’m sure my body loves me not trashing it with all the sugar. By tomorrow, I will be celebrating my victory with a cookie coma!!!!